In Loving Memory of
1stSgt. Donald E. Alfier, USMC (Ret)
Sgt. Donald E. Alfier, circa 1965
When "My Donald" passed away, I was too shocked, upset,
and angry to write an obituary. So, today, on Marine Corps Birthday,
what he called his second birthday, I will attempt to give him the recognition
he deserves.
Sergeant Donald Alfier had been in the Marine Corps
for six years when I met him on my birthday, October 4, 1966. He
was given a welcome home party from Viet Nam by his buddy who had come
home a short time earlier and his wife, my friend, gave me a birthday party.
I knew that very night that I was going to marry him and told my friend
just that. However, six years would pass before we would tie the
knot on Christmas Eve, 1972.
In the six years prior to our marriage, Don became
a Drill Instructor at MCRD, San Diego, CA where he was
promoted to Staff Sergeant. That was followed
by a tour in Okinawa which ended in October, 1972. He was then transferred
to Quantico, VA. where I joined him in
February, 1973. He received his third meritorious
promotion to Gunnery Sergeant while serving in Quantico.
In October, 1974, we were transferred to Kaneohe,
Hawaii for three years. While we were there, we welcomed our daughter,
Adrianne Heather. Don wanted a little girl. So, it was only
natural that she became Daddy's girl immediately. I remember as vividly
as if it was yesterday, what my man of few words wrote on the card with
the flowers he sent to me. It said simply, "Thank you, Love, Don."
I have to admit that he changed as many diapers as I did. They earned
certificates for walking across Kilauea volcano when
Adrianne was just two years old. We went everywhere together even
into her teen years when most teenagers rebel and would be embarrassed
to be seen with their parents. We enjoyed each others company and doing
things as a family, especially the long weekend rides. Don was our
chauffeur.
When we were transferred to back to Quantico,
VA we didn't mind. Don used to take us "critter hunting" at dusk.
We would count how many deer we saw, sometimes just by their eyes shining
in our headlights. It was delightful to see that staunch Marine making
snow angels with Adrianne in the deep snow. That tour, however, was
cut short when Don was "deep selected" for First Sergeant. He was
immediately shipped to Okinawa for thirteen months. Adrianne and
I went home to California. That was the loneliest year we ever spent.
Our last tour of duty was Camp Pendleton, CA.
It took six months to get housing so Don drove two hours each way from
Anaheim until a house was available. We loved it there. We could
see the sailboats on the ocean from the kitchen window. That was
to be our last duty station. First Sergeant Donald Alfier retired
in October, 1981 having served twenty one years in the service of his country.
But, Don was not one to sit on his laurels. Immediately
upon retiring, he was hired as a security officer by TRW Aerospace Div.
in Redondo Beach, CA. He planned to do only what was asked of him and collect
his paycheck. But, I knew better. After a very short period
of time, he enrolled in college. By working nights and going to school
during the day, he received his degree in Criminal Justice. What
a proud moment that was watching him walk up to receive his diploma!
He worked his way up the ladder at TRW. When he had to travel, he
called every night. It was comforting just hearing his voice.
Plus, he ALWAYS brought home souvenirs. By the time he retired, twenty
two years later in July 2003, he was Physical Security Manager.
Donald was also a proud grandpa. Angelique Marie
was born in 1995. She called him Daddy just like her mom did.
He was the only one who could comfort her when she'd wake up screaming
with colic. Don would sleep in his recliner with her tiny body lying
over his heart. It didn't matter that he had to get up at 5 am to
get ready for work. He bought her a pink jeep that she had to grow
into and taught her how to ride a bike so they could go riding together.
When she started school, he was always there to help her with her homework
and to give encouragement and support as he had always given to Adrianne
and me. He didn't expect perfection but emphasized the importance
of always striving to do her best. Since drug abuse was his
pet peeve, he explained to her why drugs aren't cool and to avoid those
use them.
We sold our home in California and bought our dream
home in Arizona in August, 2003. We went shopping almost daily to
find just the right furnishings. After taking Angelique to the school
bus stop, we walked at least three miles every morning and discussed our
plans to go camping with other family members and the trip we already had
planned for Angelique's fall break. One morning, however, Don
was too tired to make it back home. So I walked home to get the car.
After picking him up, we went to our favorite restaurant for breakfast.
He made a doctor's appointment and went for a routine angiogram the day
after Easter. They found that his kidneys were failing, plus he had
three arteries blocked in his heart. He fought very hard and after
five weeks in ICU and another three weeks in rehab, on June 8, 2004, I
brought him home . We were a complete family again and so positive
that he was on the road to recovery that we went to our favorite restaurant.
He was happy that he was getting his appetite back. We were settling
into our daily routine again when, on Sunday morning, June 13, 2004, God
revealed His plan for Don. He passed away in his sleep.
Since Don and I did everything together, I am struggling
with the loss of the most loving and caring person I've ever known.
They say that time heals all wounds. I pray that eventually my overwhelming
feelings of sorrow, loneliness, and anger will cease and I can go on living
with all of the wonderful memories that "My Donald" and I shared over nearly
thirty two years of marriage.
Semper Fi, Daddy.
Leila, Adrianne,
and Angelique |